Katy Schafer ‘18
Not only do first dates come with nerves, apprehension, and awkward silences, but also the promise of love, a sense of hope, and excitement. Though some are better than others, some lessons come with time and some are picked up less than 30 minutes into the date. While some see first dates as simple as 2+2, others are convinced that making a first date go well is similar to making pigs fly.
The more experience you have with first dates, the better you can be at first impressions. While some people have a hard time carrying conversation, others won’t stop talking about themselves. So what’s the easiest way to know if staying with someone is worth it after just a couple hours? “You know you’re with the right person when you’re comfortable and the conversation flows. Silence shouldn’t be a natural occurrence because you should be getting to know the person and seeing if you could be compatible with them on a level higher than being just friends,” senior Lexi Hauck said. Hauck has been on 5 first dates, and by far the most memorable one was a simple dinner with easy conversation. Her boyfriend, Jared Townsley, mentioned that they are still able to laugh about their first date because of how well it went.
As it turns out, dating a lot of people also means heartbreak isn’t too far off. The average female will experience two heartbreaks, but not before she kisses fifteen men, has two long-term relationships, and goes on seven dates along with two blind dates and two with people they met online.
It’s suggested that one should date as many people as possible before they settle down with whom they plan to spend the rest of their life. Being able to share stories about the parts of your life that your date hasn’t been around for helps them to learn more about you to see if you are compatible. The more dates you go on, the more comfortable you get, and the easier it becomes to be yourself. “On my first date with my boyfriend who I have now been dating for three years, he forgot his wallet and I paid for dinner,” senior Megan Mrocka said. “I didn’t mind paying, and we still laugh about it to this day.”
The other side of this is that some first dates are worse than others. Some people never get used to the nerves, others haven’t been on enough dates to know how to act in certain situations. There is no clear solution to this issue, but spending more time with the person in a comfortable environment is a more idealistic way to get to know a person.
|His side – Nik||Her side – Lizzie|
|“Two weeks after we met, I asked her to go on a date with me to putt putt at a glow in the dark place in Brighton. We invited our friends Lexi and Jared. I drove with Lizzie and we picked up Lexi and Jared on the way. Everything went well (I won obviously) but as we go out to my car I see that my lights are still on and very dim and it turned out that I left my lights on and my car had died. I tried to jump start it for around an hour with three people, but I had to call my mom and dad who had just gotten back from being out of town. They had to come pick up me and the girl I like and my friend and his girlfriend. It was the first time they had met her and it was one of the most embarrassing things to happen to me.”||“When Nik and I went on our first dates, we went to a putt putt place. We invited our other friends that were dating to make it less awkward for the both of us, but we ended up being really comfortable around each other. Nik won, and I will never be able to live down the fact that he beat me the first time we ever competed in anything. When we started to walk out, I wasn’t completely sure which car was Nik’s since it was my first time in it, and then I saw a car with the lights on and started laughing. It’s a good thing I didn’t make fun of someone for leaving their lights on because it turns out it was Nik’s car. After trying to get help from several people to jump start his car, we still couldn’t do it. Then he said he was going to call his parents to come get us and I hadn’t been nervous for any of the date, but when he said that I got really nervous because I hadn’t met them before that day. They ended up being really nice about the situation, and I got to know them on the car ride home. Nik and I are still dating today, so I’d say it was a memorable first date.”|
The average relationship lasts 2 years and 9 months, and the average heart beats 80 times per minute. This means that if you were to live to the age of 80, your heart will have beaten about 3,363,840,000 times. Is it worth it to spend an average 116,236,800 of those heartbeats invested in one person? Some may say dating many people is draining and useless, others see it as using them to the fullest of their abilities. I believe that each new heartbeat is a chance to make a world of difference in your life. A chance to try something new, make life changing decisions, or even fall in love. The easiest way to know is by starting with just 9,600 heartbeats, a first date.
Photo courtesy of Dating Advice