Get long term: How to make distance work

Megan Mrocka 18’

When you first start dating someone, you want nothing but to be with them. Whether it is cuddling or out to a movie, the presence of your significant other makes you enjoy your time spent together. However, under certain circumstances, you may be split apart. Maybe you met online and have never had to opportunity to meet. Maybe your significant other has a job that takes them far away. Sometimes, you simply just can’t be together as much as you desire. Unfortunately, not many people are keen on the idea of living far away from something that makes them happy. However, there are some things you can do to help alleviate the pain of being away from them. Continue reading find out seven things you can do to help make your long distance relationship successful.

1.) Avoid excessive communication

In order to be successful, you cannot be clingy to your significant other. A college freshman, William Butler said, “My girlfriend knows I am coming back at the end of the day for her, so she doesn’t bug me during the day to answer.” There is no need to talk constantly. They may be trying to work, exercise, or relax on their own. You do not need to be in their business 24/7. Doing so will only cause them to become irritated of not being able to have a life outside of you.
2.) Set ground rules to manage expectations

Are you allowed to hang out with exes? Are you going to have a phone call at least once a day? How often are you going to facetime? In order for your relationship to work, you need to have some ground rules. It is not fair to your partner if you are out partying every night acting like you are single. It is also important to schedule times to call. Talking on the phone is an intimate thing when you’re miles apart. The sound of their voice is enough to make you crack a smile like a crescent moon.
3.) Make visits to each other

Whenever it is possible, try and see one another. This will make the waiting well worth it. The feeling will be like no other when you are able to hold hands and cuddle. A friend of mine, Sean Banaszak, said, “One time a year I go to my girlfriend’s college and she comes to mine.” They also plan to be together during big breaks from the school year such as winter break and spring break. Being with your S.O. gives hope that your relationship will succeed because you are willing to go the extra mile to make them happy.
4.) Communicate regularly

A must in a long distance relationship is saying good morning and goodnight. Without those words, it is easy to lose track of how much you have talked, and it is almost insulting to your partner. These are two simple messages that allow your S.O. to know that they are on your mind. It may not seem like much, but it makes a world of difference. It shows you care more when you send them. Other messages like “How is/was your day?”, “How are you feeling?”, and “Do you have any plans soon?” all show that you are interested in their life and well being.
5.) Have a support system

Coming from a long distance relationship of 20+ years, Mrs. Cathy Koogler said that, ”You
should have a support system or team. Friends, family, coworkers, neighbors, or even school friends are great options.” Most people tend to rely heavily on their partner that they are around a lot. What happens when you live 500 miles away? You need people by your side that are able help you when the going gets rough. A support system will not only help you when you need it, but it will keep you going and help you flourish in your own time.
6.) Stay occupied

When you are sitting alone and bored, your thoughts tend to creep up on you. This can take a turn for the worst if you begin to overthink. Koogler said, “Keep busy with your life. When your life is full, you tend to be more positive.” There are activities you can do to keep your mind away from saddening thoughts. You could do things such as baking, yoga or create a new hobby. Grab some people from your support system and go shopping. The possibilities are endless.

7.) Be true and open to your significant other

Last but not least, stay truthful. There should be no lies, no hiding things, and especially no cheating. Banaszak said,”The biggest thing is trust. You can’t be paranoid all the time about what the other person is doing.” A huge part of a relationship is openly communicating about feelings and concerns. If you keep them to yourself, they are going to bubble up at some point and come out. Most importantly, do not cheat on your partner. This is especially common in long distance relationships, due to the lack of intimacy. If you are not happy, then it is best that you express those feelings and end it. Cheating will only make your situation worse than it has to be. Here are seven tips to help you succeed in your long distance relationship. Always remember to
communicate with an open mind and establish a conversation at least once every morning and every night. Remember to go out with your friends and have a good time. And lastly, just be true. You are there to work on being successful in your relationship, and the best way to enjoy it is to have a positive mindset.

Enjoy these tips, but most of all, enjoy being happy with your significant other!

Photo courtesy of The Bridal Box

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